


The Strength to My Weakness

by XxTheDarkLordxX



Series: Simple Acts [5]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Adundance of fluff, Angst, Badass Draco, Badass Harry, But just a smidgen, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Love, M/M, Order Meeting, Protective Draco, Protective Harry, Sequel, Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-09
Updated: 2017-10-09
Packaged: 2019-01-11 00:10:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12310770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/XxTheDarkLordxX/pseuds/XxTheDarkLordxX
Summary: “I’m going to be completely obvious for a moment.” Harry began with a shaky breath. “I love Draco.” He smiled softly. “This may all seem like children and their first love or teenagers with rampant hormones and that could very well be true. But that doesn’t diminish my feelings for him nor does it stop me from seeing the truth. Draco is not his father. He is not the evil of the other side. He is not a spy sent to infiltrate us. He is my boyfriend. Draco is a wonderful, beautiful, snarky bastard. I may be a part of his strength but he is the reason I have any. Draco is so much more than his name. He is so much more than his familial ties. He is so much more.”





	The Strength to My Weakness

**Author's Note:**

> So... it's been way past two weeks. Sorry! This installment is a little... different. There are a lot of emotions in this one. And I do have to give a fair warning. I MAY have read too much poetry before writing this and there are some comparisons that will definitely have you seeing this in some of my... unique word choices. Also, if you have ever wanted to hear Harry really stick it to the Order, than this story is for you! If you didn't, well, then I don't know what to tell you. 
> 
> Enjoy!

           Despite the horrendous introduction into the Order, Draco couldn’t help but be amused by the whole situation. This was entirely Harry’s fault and couldn’t be blamed on him. Which was the highlight to his day. Loving the brunette didn’t stop his self-preservation from kicking in. If there was a way to walk away without blame, he would take it. There was no shame in allowing Harry to be the one at the bottom of this mess.

            _Oh god._ Harry had never felt so mortified in his entire life. He never wanted to talk about his sex life with any of these people let alone during a fucking meeting. The look of pure horror on Mrs. Weasley’s face was the story of his bloody life. What a beautiful summary of his time spent with the Dursleys. What a poetic summary of his existence with a madman hunting him. What an ironic and sad summary of what defined him.

            Harry removed Draco’s hand from his mouth and entwined their fingers tightly. He needed the support and warmth of his boyfriend. It wasn’t even necessarily love driving him. If he was going down, he was taking Draco with him. It was only fair. After all, he hadn’t had sex alone. This was the blonde’s karma coming to repay Harry.

            “I feel as if we are in the wrong house.” Harry whispered, taking his eyes off the frozen room, relieved to see silver eyes. Even if they were amused. The damn bastard.

            “Yes.” Draco agreed with his mouth twitching. “Completely wrong house.” He gestured towards the door. “Why don’t we rectify that immediately?”

            They had only taken a few steps before, “Hold it.” Sirius demanded in a commanding tone that didn’t match the humor in his eyes and the way he was biting his lip hard from laughing. Probably saved by the fact that his back was turned to the rest of the Order and had the freedom to not having to hide his reactions.

            Harry huffed internally at his godfather. It sucked that Sirius was similar to Draco in many ways. Of course the man was finding the situation funny. Figures.

            “We didn’t realize there was a meeting today.” Harry spoke up loudly when he realized that there was no escaping this or running away.

            “Obviously.” Snape drawled from the corner of the room, not bothering to sit down like the majority of the Order.

            Draco tilted his head to the side as he regarded his godfather. There was so much that was up in the air when it came to him. He wasn’t sure what to think. He _knew_ that The Dark Lord was confident that the man was on his side of things but he also knew that Dumbledore was of the same belief. One of them was wrong. The question was, which one? He trusted his godfather to a certain degree. Well, as much as any Slytherin could afford to trust a person.

            Trust itself is not only a weakness but a grave mistake. When trust is put into the wrong person, it can get one killed. With something as important as a spy, this was detrimental. His godfather was put in a dangerous but prime position. The power of having _two_ powerful wizards backing Severus was unheard of. Despite his wariness of the whole situation, Draco couldn’t help but admire that. The ability to not only fool the enemy but also your peers, is the true mark of a Slytherin.

            Black eyes met silver but Draco’s shields were properly in place. Pale eyebrows lifted rather unimpressed at the actions of his head of house when he felt a tingle of Legilimency at the edges of his mind.

            Harry narrowed his eyes in suspicion at the way Draco and Snape seemed to be locked in some kind of silent conversation. With the Occlumency lesson still fresh in his mind, he didn’t doubt for one minute that something of that nature was happening right now. Was the man attempting anything? That wouldn’t make much sense. Well, there _had_ been points over the years where eye contact with the Potions Master had made him feel as if the man was seeing into his mind. So, maybe the idea wasn’t out of the realm of possibilities.

            “Severus.” Draco acknowledged with a nod of his head and a slight smirk, loving that his father had the foresight to actually teach him something useful.

            “Draco.” The tone was clipped and irritated and _completely_ Draco’s favorite thing to hear. If only he could keep this moment forever. It wasn’t often that someone was able to not only surprise the man but also hold their own.

            The odd greetings explained nothing to Harry but Draco didn’t seem to be upset, so there was that.

            Dumbledore cleared his throat once, drawing all attention to him.

            “We have discussed the possibility of both of your admittance into the Order.”

            Harry and Draco shared a look of surprise. It was so _nice_ of the Order to have not uttered a single word to either of them. It was so _nice_ to be blind sighted like this. So _nice_ to have been in the dark for something that could change _everything_. What was the point? It was almost as if they had been set up for failure. If they had _known_ that there was an Order meeting, this would have gone completely different.

            “The meeting has gone as expected.”

            A few disbelieving stares had Draco doubting the statement. There was something so unbelievably annoying about someone who ‘knew’ everything without considering the reality of the situation. He would respect the man more if the Headmaster would just admit that sometimes he didn’t have an answer. That sometimes, things don’t go according to plan and that people can surprise you.

            “The Order was not able to come to a conclusive consensus.”

            Harry narrowed his eyes, already knowing where this was headed. “Because of Draco or me?” His tone was hard and was just begging someone to answer it the wrong way. Because he was not in the mood to play around.

            “Both.” Moody barked out. “Your questionable decisions not to mention age are a factor.”

            Draco let out a low whistle at the look in Harry’s eyes. Merlin, he wouldn’t want to be the one on the receiving end of _that_.

            Anger was something that Harry had gotten quite used to over the past year. He used to believe that it was a side effect of the connection from Voldemort but the longer he considered this, the more he realized that it was his own anger. Sure, it was amplified from the connection but it was his own rage sizzling inside his veins. It was his own temper and once that was acknowledged, it was easier to control. Because the thought of it being someone else’s had created a sense of helplessness. That coupled with the failing Occlumency lessons with Snape, Harry had felt like the anger was a foreign substance in his body that he couldn’t expel. But the knowledge that it was _his_ anger and no one else’s, led him to the realization that he had to own it. He had to take that anger and make it into something positive. Had to make it something he could use to fuel his own decisions.

            Right now, his anger was mounting dangerously but he knew that he _had_ to keep it in check. Otherwise he would explode and prove Moody right that he was too young. Which was honestly the stupidest thing he has heard in a long time.

            “Tell me.” Harry began as his eyes narrowed and sharpened in on the paranoid man. “Has my age stopped Voldemort from coming after me? Has my age stopped his plots and his plans?” He looked around the room, as if expecting someone to answer his questions.

            “Tell me, has my age made it impossible to fight back? Because last time _I_ checked, I did fight him. I did make it out alive. You may call it luck, accident, coincidence or any number of things but I have my own question. What was it that affected _you_ when you were caught unawares? Was it your age that had you susceptible to being captured? Because last time _I_ checked, you lost an entire year.”

            “Harry!” Molly chided loudly but with surprise as well.

            Harry held up a hand, pausing anything else she could say. He knew that it was a low blow bringing up the man’s situation but this was necessary.

            “You, with your Auror skills and _years_ of experience weren’t just captured, your appearance was used to fool _everyone_. Who knows what kind of dangerous things could have happened under Crouch’s ruse. If he had chosen to come out of retirement instead of for Hogwarts but say for the Ministry, can you imagine the intel that Voldemort would have gained? Every single conversation Crouch held with your face and name is under suspect. Do you even _know_ what your friends or past colleagues had said to him? Do you even know what kind of things were passed on?” Harry paused to allow the question to sink in. He didn’t doubt for one moment that this hadn’t already crossed the man’s mind but it might be news to some of the other members.

            “Despite the training you have had to stop something like this from happening, you still fell. I’m not insulting your skills or your training. My point is that you are as trained as it comes and yet, it still didn’t save you. It still didn’t protect you. So, what makes you think that excluding me—the one Voldemort is known for coming after—would be a good idea? Someone who doesn’t have that training, someone who doesn’t have that skill. Shouldn’t the person at the forefront of the entire movement, be included in what goes on? Why would keeping me ignorant be a wise choice? _That_ is a recipe for disaster. _That_ is a weak link that he _will_ use against all of us.”

            Harry let out an exasperated noise as he tightened his hold on Draco’s hand, needing the other boy.

            “Voldemort _knows_ this. He knows that in the eyes of everyone that I am just a child. Someone that isn’t trusted to have information. Which is why he tried to get to me with the Ministry. He sent me dreams for months, hoping to lure me there. If it wasn’t for Draco, I would have gone. I would have fell for his trap in a heartbeat.”

            Sirius let out a shaky breath at the thought of anything that could have gone wrong. He didn’t like being the bait that had been used against his godson. Didn't like considering the what ifs.

            “Why? Because none of you had the bloody insight to include me. If you had just told _me_ what was going on, then I wouldn’t have thought Sirius was there. I would have _known_ what was going on and tried to block him with Occlumency harder. But no, because fuck logic, right? Because you guys are the ones behind the scenes micromanaging everything except for what matters the most. _I_ am the one Voldemort is going to come after. _I_ am the one he is fixated on. I will either be the reason we win, or the reason we fail. Only question, is will it be because you helped me or hindered me?” He ran his free hand through his hair roughly.

            “Because if you keep me in the dark, I will just be a sitting duck. A giant beacon that attracts Voldemort but has zero defenses. What is the point of protecting me, if you aren’t going to give me knowledge? That makes me this figurehead with no sense of purpose. Sure, I am the boy-who-lived but to you I am just a namesake. I am just someone you get to claim for your side but not actually include. The Order should have come to me and _asked_ me to join, not the other way around.”

            A few eyebrows rose at the gall of the statement but Harry ignored this and pressed on.

            “I don’t have to join you to fight Voldemort. With or without you, Voldemort will come after me. He will continue to fixate on me. If you won’t treat me as an equal, then I won’t bother caring. I’ll do it on my own because I’ve already been doing that my whole life.”

            “And you think that you’ll get far on your own?” Moody asked with narrowed eyes and clenched fists.

            “No.” Harry admitted softly. “But I’m not getting anywhere like this either. Doing nothing accomplishes nothing. While you all sit at meetings and decide _my_ fate, I am the one living it. I am the one who will have to fight no matter what. Because Voldemort will never stop coming after me. He will never leave me alone. If you won’t include me properly, then what’s the point?” He threw up his free hand in the air as he shook his head rapidly.

           “Again, I don’t _have_ to do a damn thing that you guys want me to. None of you have ever been in my corner. You think you can decide what’s best for me, without taking my own wants into consideration? You think you can just choose to take my age as a negative but refuse to see that my age doesn’t mean a damn thing to Voldemort? You act as if I should be grateful to be denied the right to the Order. As if you had a say so anyways. The Order doesn’t _own_ me. I don’t have to be here. I don’t have to be treated as if I am nothing of importance.”

            “That isn’t how we see you.” Arthur spoke up vehemently.

            Harry arched a brow. “Really?” The doubt was palpable. “I am important to the Order, _so_ important that I am always told to sit back and do nothing. Oh, Harry doesn’t need to know anything. It’s not as if he isn’t the target of a madman. I am only important to you when it matters. I am so sick of being in the dark. I am so sick of being considered your damn mascot. Well, I don’t want it. I don’t want to be a part of something like this. So, I don’t care if you won’t accept me into the Order. I don’t care what you decide because I never got a choice to begin with. No one asked me what I wanted.”

            He looked away with a heavy breath as he locked eyes with Draco. There was worry in there, which was to be expected. This was taking a scary stance. He wasn’t just making a choice for him, he was choosing one for the both of them. Because they were a unified front now. Draco didn’t have another option. This was it. Despite the worry, there was an almost proud quality gleaming in those beautiful eyes. It was comforting and the proof that he would always have support in his boyfriend.

            Draco searched Harry’s face, trying to figure out how upset his lover was. The Occlumency training would have made his emotions a little erratic. But he couldn’t help but be proud of his boyfriend. Harry deserved the world and these people weren’t helping him in the slightest.

            “What is it you want?” Remus asked quietly.

            “I want a lot of things. I want the chance to be a child, something that was taken from me. I want a proper family, one that wasn’t horrendous. I want the world to make sense. I want to not be the obsession of a lunatic. I want prejudice to not exist. I want suffering to be nonexistent. I want peace without the destruction that it will take to obtain it. I want a lot of unrealistic things.” Harry whispered, eyes still on Draco.

            “But most of all, I want to be my own person. I want to be treated as an equal. The Order will _not_ use my name but exclude me from the important parts. I will not be your silent and willing puppet that questions nothing and is easily susceptible to half-truths and the bits of scraps that are thrown my way.”

            Harry looked to Dumbledore with considering eyes. “You want me to be this person of good, someone that fights Voldemort but I can’t do that without the knowledge that is required. I can’t do that if things are to remain as they have been. I _won’t_ do it. If you only wish to throw me to the side when not needed, then find someone else. Find another savior. Find someone else to be your figure of light. Because that isn’t me. Not anymore.”

            “Entitlement of a child.” Snape sneered angrily.

            That had Harry tilting his head to the side. “A child who is in the middle of two sides fighting. A child who didn’t get a say so. A child who wants no part of it. A child who did nothing to warrant any kind of attention. A child who lost everything before being able to talk. A child who had the weight of the world thrusted upon him the moment he entered the wizarding world. A child who is crucial to this organization. A child who is the prime target.” He shook his head sadly.

            “You call me a child. But what normal child has to live a life like that? What typical child do you know of that has this much responsibility but not an ounce of trust handed to them? If wanting to be on equal footing has me being a child, then I don’t want to be an adult. I certainly don’t want to be like you. Not if the end result is a bitter attitude and a blindness that is a catalyst to reality.”

            Draco winced slightly at the hatred and anger shining on his godfather’s face.

            “Excuse you?” The dangerous quality to Snape’s tone didn’t bother Harry. It wasn’t the first time he had been on the receiving end of this. Neither did the way the man took a step forward and adopted a threatening stance, worry him.

            Sirius took a step forward, not-so-subtly pulling out his wand. “Want to add actions to your words? We can see who is the real child.”

            The sneer Snape released had Harry rolling his eyes. “Yes, because you are the expert on what classifies a child, Black.”

            “As Harry said, if being an adult is in the same classification as you, I don’t want to be an adult.”

            “Gentlemen.” Dumbledore’s tone was commanding and hard.

            Harry straightened up when blue eyes looked to him in a calculating manner. “You may be young but you are correct in the belief that you aren’t a child.” Dumbledore began softly. “I should have taken you aside long before and explained things to you.”

            The Headmaster held up a hand when several people made noises of interruption. “Harry is a year away from being of age. If Voldemort is to continue to attack, we need to prepare him. We cannot have any weaknesses that will be exploited. We cannot allow Harry to remain in the dark.”

            “So, you’ll just induct him into the Order?” Molly asked in bewilderment. “He’s still in school and _underage_.”

            “He has my support.” Sirius crossed his arms defiantly. “ _I_ am his godfather and if _I_ give him permission, that should be all he needs.”

            “You don’t control what the Order does.” Snape sneered. “It isn’t your _permission_ that is required.”

            Before Sirius could retort, Harry sighed heavily. “You are operating under the belief that I _want_ to join.”

            That had everyone quieting down. “I wasn’t saying things just to hear myself talk, you know.” He pointed out dryly. “If I won’t be treated as an equal, then I don’t _want_ to be included. I don’t _need_ the Order. If you want me to join, then I will be asked. Not when I’m of age. Not when things get worse. Not when all shite goes to hell and in need of me. No. If you want me, then ask me now. Accept me as I am now and not as you believe me to be.”

            Admiration wasn’t something Draco was used to feeling but he couldn’t help but admire Harry at this moment. It was brilliant. The move wouldn’t garner any friends and might work against the image they had of the brunette but it was utterly brilliant.

            “While I may be young and inexperienced, that won’t always be the case. I will get better, older and hopefully wiser. By then, none of this will matter. Because my decision will have long been made. For some reason, you look at me and see my faults and not the potential that is there. It is as if you expect the end result without allowing the progress in the middle. You see me as a child and not the person that I am. You see someone younger than my actions are. I am not going into any of this blindly or unaware. I know exactly who I am up against. This isn’t some fantasy or a wish to be included because I think it is interesting or fun. This is life and death. The Order has the potential to be what it was designed to do. Which is to be a powerhouse against the opposition. But not at this rate. Not with the way things are going or the attitudes being adopted.”

            When no one said anything and just peered at him curiously, Harry felt like it was time to bring up something else.

            “Also, accepting me is also accepting Draco.”

            All hell broke loose.

            Draco looked to the ceiling as he forced his annoyance down several notches. The yells of too many people were ringing loudly in his ears. How deplorable. Did they have zero decorum?

            “He’s a Death Eater!”

            _Hold on_. Draco shook his head slowly and dramatically, drawing attention to himself.

            “I may be a lot of things—most of them negative—but a Death Eater I am not. I am quite curious as to where _that_ line of thought came from.”

            “Your father is a Death Eater.” Fletcher piped up with narrowed eyes.

            “Spot on. Funnily enough, I _had_ figured that out.”

            Harry’s mouth twitched as he tried to be angry that his boyfriend wasn’t playing nice. But honestly, he didn’t expect the Slytherin to be anyone that he wasn’t. Besides, it wasn’t as if he had been nice to the Order either.

            “But please tell me how that has any correlation to my own status?” Draco honestly wanted to know. “His mistakes are his own. His problems aren’t mine. His Death Eater status is not _my_ title. I am _not_ a Death Eater nor have I _ever_ been one.”

            “Do you have proof of this?” Moody barked.

            It took several internal deep breaths and a tightening of Harry’s hand in his own to stop him from saying things that would make him more of an enemy.

            “I should be surprised but taking in account of your blatant prejudice, I’m not.” Draco dropped Harry’s hand for a moment as he showed them both of his arms.

            “How do we know it isn’t somewhere else?” An older lady with greying hair asked.

            Draco arched a brow. “If you are to ignore the fact that there has never been a Death Eater marked anywhere else, then I suppose you wouldn’t know that.” He shrugged lightly as he entwined his fingers with Harry’s once more.

            “If you’d like, I can get naked and show everyone that I am not marked anywhere else.”

            “God no.” Ron whispered. “If there is any justice in the world, _please_ let him keep his robes on.”

            Sirius and Harry snorted lightly as Draco rolled his eyes. “I’ll have you know Weasley, that I look rather striking without clothes.”

            Before Harry could nod in agreement, Moody pressed on, ignoring them completely.

            “The timing is suspicious. Why _now_? Why should we believe that you have had a change of heart? Not to mention your _relationship_ seems too convienent.”

            Harry blinked rapidly. “I must have heard you wrong. Because if you are insinuating that I fell into bed with Draco in just the few days he has been here then you are _sorely_ mistaken.” He wasn’t sure he liked the assumption that he was that easy. Not that it would be a wrong assumption but he still didn’t like it.

            “I have been with Draco for _months_. Many months. Long before he chose a side and long before this meeting was thought of.” He paused to watch surprise flash across their faces. “Besides, I seduced _him_.”

            “Hold on a minute?” Draco countered with a finger in the air. “I deny this. If I recall correctly, I seduced _you_.”

            Harry searched Draco’s face in bemusement. “What fantasy are you living in?” He arched a brow curiously. “I was the one pining after you for months. Ron can attest to this.”

            “Un-fucking-fortunately” Ron grumbled with a glare at the both of them.

            “And I wasn’t?” Draco asked in exasperation. “I have been after you since the first moment I saw you.”

            Harry’s heart melted and he knew his eyes softened. He remembered the feelings Draco had felt in the memory of their first meeting. He could recall the excitement and even the unknown feelings bubbling up.

            “I made the first move.” Draco continued, hating that he said that in front of so many people.

            “Did not.” Harry argued. “You overheard a conversation between Ron and I, and chose to act on.”

            That had Draco smirking. “That classifies as making the first move.”

            “Not unless our conversation counts as the true first move and yours was just the second.”

            Draco scoffed. “Now who is living in a fantasy? _If_ I hadn’t heard that conversation, you would still be arguing with Weasley over if being with me is a good idea or not.”

            “I’m still waiting on the proof that it was.” Ron honestly admitted quietly. He shook his head when he was on the receiving end of two glares from Harry and Malfoy.

            “Perhaps we seduced each other?” Harry countered diplomatically.

            “In your dreams.” Draco wrapped his arms around Harry’s waist and pulled him close. “Face it, Harry, you may have been pining after me and even had plans to act on it but _I_ seduced you.”

            Harry rolled his eyes but allowed himself to be encased in strong arms. Arguing was something Draco excelled at and this wasn’t a battle worth fighting. Besides, he would allow his boyfriend to seduce him at any given time. Did it really matter how they came to be?

            The silence from Harry had Draco smirking victoriously before he leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the Gryffindor’s forehead.

            “Do they do this often?” Tonks asked curiously as she rested her elbows on the table and her head on her palms.

            “Yes.” Remus and Sirius spoke in unison.

            “I am of the belief that it's some form of foreplay.” Remus mused with considering eyes. “It’s never violent or even angry. They just like to one up each other and usually they end up going to their room afterwards.”

            “Remus.” Sirius scolded with a shudder. “How many times do I have to tell you that I don’t want to _know_ any of this. I would rather be ignorant.”

            “An everyday occurrence for you.” Snape drawled out with a slight smirk.

            “Self-control.” Sirius whispered to Remus. “That’s what it takes to not snap, right?”

            “Yes.” Remus was amused as he agreed.

            “Fuck. I don’t have that.”

            Remus rolled his eyes as he gripped the back of Sirius’ robes and held on tightly. Sometimes, he wondered if the man had ever aged in maturity. Even Draco and Harry were better behaved than this.

            Harry looked back to the Order and ignored the way they were gazing at the two of them calculatingly. “Draco was the one who told me to be wary of Kreacher. He was the one who made me doubt things. When Kreacher told me that Sirius was at the Ministry, I knew he was lying. Draco is the one who stopped anything bad from happening that night.”

            Hermione cocked her head to the side as she looked between the two close boys with consideration. She hadn’t quite heard this before. During the hectic chaos of Harry being so determined that Sirius was in danger, the reasons behind everything had faded away. No one had mentioned to her that Malfoy had warned Harry ahead of time. It wasn’t that she was upset or angry, she was just curious. What had happened for the Slytherin to even want to mention it?

            She couldn’t deny the closeness between the two of them. There was a softness and even love in Malfoy’s eyes when he looked to Harry. Which surprised her. Ever since finding out about their relationship, Hermione had been worried about her best friend. Harry had a hard life and didn’t need someone like Malfoy to make things worse or even complicated.

            Hermione sighed internally the longer she stared between the two of them. Harry had been telling her for quite some time that Malfoy wasn’t what she thought him to be. She knew that she was being unfair by her stubborn disapproval but the clear memories of the taunts and insults were still imbedded into the thick skin she pretends to have.

            It wasn’t just the things that Malfoy taunted that got to her. It was the crushing ache at not fitting in. Every word and every curse uttered was just another reminder that she didn’t _belong_. That she wasn’t seen as someone worthy to be here. That no matter what she did or how hard she worked, no one would see past her status as a muggleborn. No one would take into consideration who she was as a person.

            Books were always the only thing that was easy. It was simple to get lost in a book and there wasn’t anything in there that could hurt her. Even before Hogwarts, Hermione had never gotten along well with people. They just didn’t accept her for her love of knowledge. Books didn’t hurl insults. Books didn’t judge and they certainly didn’t make her feel dull in a world full of people meant to shine.

            There had been an undeniable excitement when she entered the wizarding world. It meant that she wasn’t as weird as she had always feared. This was a chance to make actual friends who could _understand_ her.

            Unfortunately, it took months before anyone had actually seen her for who she was. Lonely. That was what Hogwarts had been before Harry and Ron had rescued her in the bathroom. Well, if that blundering disaster could ever be considered a rescue. It wasn’t as if they had been knights in shining armor. More like knights tripping over themselves and happening to kill the dragon by mistake. Only, it was a troll that wasn’t bright and luck had been on their side.

            Ron and Harry were her best friends. They may not understand her in the ways she always wished but they were there for her and that was what mattered. Harry was loyal to tee and the most caring person she has ever come across. He could be courageous when most would flee, wild when others would be calm and loving while some would be hateful. She had never seen him give up on something he believed in and he honestly inspired her every single day. There wasn’t a moment that went by where she wasn’t grateful that they had become friends.

            Ron was her heart. Not just because they were together but because he was the heart of their trio. While Harry was the courage that spurred them on, Ron was the glue of support that held them together. The redhead cared deeply about things, in ways that weren’t as obvious as Harry. Ron was the subtle smiles when she was feeling down. He was the quiet in the common room when the rest of the house was yelling, because he knew she needed to read just one more chapter. He was the teasing jibes when their spirits needed to rise. He was the one to offer his food to them, despite that being his main joy in life. Ron was the type of person to give up his own needs to make sure that his friends had theirs. Despite that the boy not having much to offer in the first place.

            Hermione honestly loved Ron and Harry. They were the only thing that made it _worth it_. They made facing the prejudice _worth it_. They made being seen as inferior _worth it_. They were _worth it_. She was _worth it_.

            It had been hard leaving behind the comfort of the mundane. Especially considering the tradeoff was to be treated as someone not worthy of the benefits of all other witches and wizards. Part of her hated everything Malfoy stood for, the part of her that thrived on justice and equality. The part that just wanted to be _seen_. The part that wanted to be given a shot. Just a simple chance. Why couldn’t she prove her worth? Why couldn’t she just be given the same opportunities as others? She was human too. _Didn’t that matter?_

            Giving into hatred is an endless cycle and she _really_ didn’t want to give the boy the credit of occupying her mind. Not when he didn’t deserve it.

            But… the longer she stared at them, the more she recognized parts of herself in Malfoy. Parts that she never considered before. It had never crossed her mind that the blonde might have been in her shoes at one point in time. Perhaps not in the same manner but maybe a different kind?

            Prejudice. There wasn’t any one specific way to define that. Coming from the muggle world, it was something that many different kinds of people can adopt. There are many ways to dress up prejudice but the underlying hatred can never be hidden.

            When she was first introduced into the wizarding world, her mind had been preoccupied with the problems she herself would have to face. She had never actually considered the prejudice on the other side. It wasn’t as if the word belonged to her or anyone of their beliefs. Prejudice is something that anyone can face at any time.

            There had been a spark of injustice in Malfoy’s eyes when he was accused of using Harry. That was a look she knew a thousand times over. It was the same look she herself had casted at the Slytherin It was the look of anger and bitter acceptance. It was the resignation in knowing that nothing you do will change a single thing. It was the belief of wanting to change the minds of those who are ignorant but can’t achieve that goal without their cooperation. It was a look that changed her entire outlook.

            Malfoy growing up with the world telling you that being dark is wrong and being different is seen as evil, would leave someone jaded and bitter. It would make someone cold and indifferent. Hermione knew from firsthand experience that being different wasn’t wrong. That sometimes, being different is just learning on a different wavelength. Was Malfoy on a different wavelength than the rest of them? Was he taught things that they weren’t? Was he treated with a prejudice that she had never considered? Had the victim become the bully?

            Her mind was going in a thousand different directions the longer she thought about this. It showed a deeper duality to the blonde and she wasn’t sure how to take this. Part of her wanted to scoff and say that it didn’t matter how he was treated, what mattered was his actions. But she couldn’t do that. Just because she wouldn’t do the things he had, didn’t mean that he couldn’t atone for his sins. It didn’t mean that he couldn’t have personal growth. No one is perfect and mistakes are inevitable. Perhaps the Slytherin had decided who he really wanted to be.

            This was hard. Choosing to be the bigger person shouldn’t be this hard. It seemed so _easy_ to ignore this, it seemed too simple to write it all off and continue to disapprove. But the little girl who used to hide during breaks just to avoid being a target couldn’t turn her back on someone who might have never had their Ron or Harry. Malfoy didn’t seem close with any of his fellow Slytherins. Had the boy ever had anyone to confide in?

            _Damnit_. Her heart was torn. She wanted to see the best in people but it was so _hard_. Every time she closed her eyes to consider this, all she could see was Malfoy’s sneer and the crushing ache of being judged for something that she couldn’t control. But every time she opened them, she could see Harry’s happy smile and Malfoy’s shining eyes as they looked at each other.

            Someone who could love Harry like that couldn’t be bad. Someone who had the capabilities of seeing past an enemy to not only help them but love them too, couldn’t be evil. Forgiveness isn’t easy but is anything in life ever _really_ easy?

            Hermione sighed heavily as she looked to ceiling for a moment. All she had ever wanted was a chance to prove herself. That had yet to happen but that didn’t mean she couldn’t give that to someone else. As much as it killed her, she would do it. She would give Malfoy the chance to prove himself. She would give him the one thing that he had refused to do for her.

             If this didn’t get her into heaven, then nothing would.

            “He knew that Sirius would be used as bait?” Came Moody’s doubting voice.

            The fact that the man wasn’t directing his question to Draco really bothered Harry. It was so infuriating to try and have this disaster go like any normal conversation would go. It wasn’t as if Draco had started this, it wasn’t as if Draco had been the first one to be rude. For some reason, they were coming into this with closed minds. Which is the wrong attitude to have.

            “No.” Draco shook his head slowly. “I had no idea what their plans were because I was never told. I just knew that Kreacher was involved from the few times that I saw him at home.”

            “Even they didn’t trust you. Your own parents.”

            Draco narrowed his eyes at the new voice. He wasn’t sure who this was but he knew from the way the young man held themselves that they would never get along. There was something off about him and he couldn’t quite put his finger on it.

            Harry tried placing the new person but there wasn't any memories of ever meeting the man before. He was younger than most members, probably early twenties. Light brown hair but cold eyes that didn't seem to know warmth. Strong cheekbones but lips turned downward in a seemingly permanent frown. There was something about him that he couldn't stand, which wasn't something that happened to him often. Judging without knowing wasn't a normal reaction for Harry.  

            “As if that’s somehow an insult.” Draco retorted with a sneer. “It’s so easy to judge when you are all so high and mighty. As if you are perfect. Easy to imagine what goes on behind closed doors. Easy to sit there and act as if you _know_ a damn thing about me. Yes, my father is a Death Eater. Yes, he is a bastard. Yes, he is despicable. Yes, he is Voldemort’s right hand man. Yes, he is probably every single bad thing you have ever thought. But here’s the thing, I just want you to picture him being nice. I know how unlikely that is. But do me a favor and picture it anyways. I want you to see him holding me for the first time and smiling. I want you to see a father’s pride when I pronounce all my words correctly. I want you to see my father’s whispered words of affection when I get into Slytherin. I want you to picture a loving father.”

            Draco paused and waited as a few people scrunched up their faces in distaste.

            “It’s hard, right? Because that never fucking happened. You see my father as this villainous guy but assume that he must have treated me any different than he would you. When you look to him and see his faults, you act as if I don’t see them. As if I didn’t have to _live_ with those faults. As if he was another person behind closed doors than what you already see. Lucius Malfoy has _never_ been a nice person. Not to any of you. Not to his friends and certainly never to me.”

            Harry could see the way Mrs. Weasley’s frown shifted to one of dislike to one of worry. It didn’t surprise him in the slightest that she would begin to see Draco’s hard life as a parental insult. The woman loved children and genuinely disliked when neglect happened to others.

            “Don’t sit here and act as if it bothers me that I was never trusted. Don’t throw out your facts of his status as if it will offend me. There are a lot of things that can be said about me and my father but _never_ assume for a single moment that I mattered to him. Never think that I aim to do underhand things in some twisted form of his approval. Because _nothing_ I ever do will be seen as a positive in his eyes. My father is one of the motives that drives me.” He could see confused faces and hurried to explain.

            “My father is the doubt in the middle of the night when I can’t sleep. He is the fear of failing but not having the conviction to change anything. He is the harsh words that stop a dream before it can ever form. My father is everything I don’t want to be. I look at him and notice similarities. I see how much we look alike, I see that our sneers are identical and the eyes are close in shade. I see the same prejudice that fills us. I see the same cold and bitter attitude. I see the hatred and misguided beliefs. I see how we are _so_ similar.”

            Harry wanted to shake his head and deny all of this. Draco was so much more than the similarities to Lucius. He was so much more than what meets the eye.

            “But I am not a carbon copy.” Draco continued quietly. “I am more than those similarities. I am more than what you see on the surface. I am different enough to know that I don’t want to be like this. I don’t want to be in his shadow for the rest of my life. I don’t want people to look at me as you do. I want to be judged on my own merits. I want someone to look at me and see Draco before they ever see my father. I don’t want to be judged for his sins. If you are going to judge me than do it because of my _own_ mistakes.”

            Draco took a deep breath as he looked around the room. “Because I have them. I am far from perfect and never claim to have been in the first place. I have made many wrong decisions and adopted poor attitudes towards others. Judge me for that. See _my_ mistakes. See _my_ sins. But don’t see my father. _See me_.”

            Harry wrapped his arm around Draco’s waist and squeezed tightly. He saw every part of his boyfriend and loved him for it. He saw everything that Draco was and couldn’t be prouder.

            “If you don’t want to see my potential, then that’s your blind opinion. If you don’t want to give me a chance, then that’s your prerogative. If you don’t want to forgive me, then I’ll respect that. But at least be honest enough to do it on my own issues and not because you dislike my father.”

            There was an uneasy silence that filled the room as everyone seemed to be caught up in either their own thoughts or staring at Draco.

           “What made you speak up about Kreacher? Would you have done so if you weren’t in a relationship with Harry?”

            Draco wasn’t sure which older Weasley this was. Names of those he cared nothing about eluded him. He was pretty sure this was the one that worked with Acromantulas. No, that wasn’t it. Dragons? Or maybe Chimaeras?

            The question held merit and it was something that he had thought about. Worries over what could’ve happened to Harry at the Ministry didn’t sit well with him. There was still a lot of things about the whole situation that hadn’t been talked about just yet.

            “I wasn’t exactly ‘with’ Harry when I brought it up.” He exchanged a glance with the brunette. “To be completely honest, I half expected to never interact with Harry again after our… exchange.” Draco smirked when most of the people picked up on what he wasn’t saying.

            “The odd bit with Kreacher had been bothering me for some time. Partly because I only knew half the story. I had no idea what they wanted him for or what the elf was doing. If I hadn’t spent time with Harry, I don’t think I would’ve mentioned it. We weren’t on good terms before and it wouldn’t have made sense going to someone that might not perceive the news well.”            

            Bill tilted his head to the side as he shot Charlie an unreadable look. “If you hadn’t expected to ‘interact’ with Harry again, why bring it up at all?”

            “Weakness, I suppose.”

            The admittance seemed to confuse people, not that it surprised him. Draco shrugged lightly. “Slytherins don’t offer up information for no reason. There is a price for everything. Telling Harry my odd, strange but truthful suspicions without getting something in return went against everything I stand for.”

            “How?”

            Draco rolled his eyes. “The unknown variables have to be taken in consideration. Facts in conversations are the wands to any spell. Without a wand, a spell won’t be the same. Most cases, nothing will even happen. The magic won’t be called forward. Sure, some can do wandless but it changes the spell slightly. It alters the spell because there is no conduit. Same thing with conversations. When offering up knowledge, facts are a necessary requirement.”

            He looked to Remus. “If I were to tell you that tomorrow I believe you will turn into a werewolf despite it not being a full moon, what would you say?”

            Remus arched a brow. “I would ask where your proof is.”

            “Exactly.” Draco gestured as if this was obvious. “Telling Harry a suspicion with zero evidence is _not_ a statement that a Slytherin _should’ve_ made. It isn’t wise to dabble in things that are unknown. I had no proof. I had nothing to give him. Just my own suspicions and little else. It was risky and unreliable.”

            “But you still did it.” Remus smiled softly as he looked between Harry and Draco.

            Draco nodded once. “Not only was it risky but I didn’t ask for anything in return. I offered up something without expecting any single thing back.” He sighed heavily at some of their disgusted looks.

            “I understand that you guys probably do kind gestures every day but we can’t all be bleeding hearts. Slytherins aren’t like that. There is a strategic tactic to making sure that there is an equal footing when dealing in offerings or deals. You wouldn’t overpay a shop keeper for their goods, or underpay someone that you employ. Why should I give away valuable information for free? Why should I not counter it with an equal opportunity?”

            Harry was highly intrigued. The Slytherin aspects to Draco completely fascinated him. It was something that he had never come across before.

            “And this makes him your weakness how?” Moody impatiently asked.

            “Harry has always been able to uproot all of my teachings.” Draco admitted with reluctance. He didn’t like telling so much about himself. It made his skin itch and his throat tighten.

            This was news to Harry. He tightened his hold on Draco's waist, they weren’t exactly into public displays of affection but hadn’t really ever been given the chance to explore that avenue.

            “Public fights, yelling matches and even duels are not something that was sanctioned by my upbringing. There is a certain protocol and decorum that is required when behaving as a proper heir would.” He paused to lean back and lock eyes with Harry as he twisted his head. “And yet, I managed to break every guideline anyways. Harry has always been able to get underneath my skin. Always been the catalyst that I’ve never been able to shake.”

            Draco sighed half in a besotted manner and half in frustration. “I used to despise the way I lost composure and succumbed to petty emotions. There was just something so bloody frustrating about Harry. Merlin, I wanted to hex his balls off.”

            Fred and George snorted loudly before completely losing it. “Lovely start to a healthy relationship.”

            Harry smiled ruefully at them before shaking his head. There had been _plenty_ of times over the years that he had wanted to do the same to Draco, so he wasn’t offended.

            “When you have a strict rule or set of beliefs and something comes across that tempts this, it becomes a weakness. Whether it’s skipping studying to play Quidditch, eating sweets on a diet or forgetting everything you’ve ever been taught when a boy with messy hair slights your pride.”

            Harry looked down for a moment as he tried not to allow himself to become flustered. He had shared so much of himself with these people already. They didn’t need to see him blush too.

            “He was my weakness long before we slept together. When the situation allowed me the chance to voice my suspicions over Kreacher, I took it. I knew that it was foolish and risky but again, Harry is my weakness.”

            That had Harry tightening his hold on Draco once again and breathing in deeply. Merlin, he loved this boy.

            “Weaknesses can be used against you.” Snape spoke up quietly. There was no sneer or harsh tone. It was the man’s way of being concerned. Most wouldn’t recognize this but Draco understood his godfather.

            “I know.” Draco retorted in the same tone. He did know this. Of course he did. “But Harry is also my strength as well.” He flushed lightly before clearing his throat. “But that doesn’t have to do with anything. No one wants to hear that.”

            “I do.” Tonks, Sirius, Remus, Arthur and surprisingly Ginny all said as one.

            Draco didn’t like this. No one said being considered for the Order would mean he would have to bare his soul.

            “You don’t have to tell them anything.” Harry whispered softly in Draco’s ears, making sure no one could hear him. “You don’t owe them the pieces you wish to keep private.”

            In a perfect world, a statement like that would make sense. But Draco knew better than anyone else that perfection was an illusion. These people needed Harry just as much as some of them cared for the brunette. If he wanted to be included, he would need to play their game. He would need to play nice. There was a glaring difference between his values and theirs. His Slytherin tactics would hinder him here. If he was going to get them to want to include him, he would have to become horribly mushy and more Hufflepuff-esque. Despite knowing this, he despised having to give up any part of himself.

            Draco held onto the hands around his waist and squeezed them once, letting Harry know that he understood.

            “I think for you to understand why he is my strength, you have to understand who Harry is as a person.”

            The rolling of eyes and even scoffs were clearly visible. It didn’t take a genius for Draco to realize that they felt as if he knew nothing about his boyfriend. As if they somehow knew him better just because they were on the same side for longer.

            “I don’t mean his name or his accomplishments. I don’t mean the things he has done against The Dark Lord or even his merits in that regard.” Draco looked down at the legs of the table instead of meeting anyone’s eyes.

            “Harry sees the world in ways that I envy.” Several people had to lean forward as Draco’s voice dropped to a whisper. “He sees so much positivity in people and it baffles me at times. Sometimes I wonder if we are seeing the same thing. Because I can look at a person and see a thousand faults but he will pluck out the one redeeming quality as if it was easy. As if the clouds of darkness never happened. Forgiveness is _not_ in my vocabulary while grudges are my expertise. We are so _different_.” He shook his head a little at his own words. Sometimes, it was odd the pairing that they made. But it worked. They worked, together.

            “Forgiveness _is_ in Harry’s vocabulary. Sometimes to the point of foolishness but that’s just who he is.” Draco smirked when the hands holding him slapped his stomach playfully.     

            “I don’t think he has ever truly held a grudge against someone. He likes to work things out with people. If something is bothering him, it eats at him until it gets resolved.”

            Harry furrowed his brows as he tried to think of when this had ever been discussed before. Did Draco just know things about him? Or was he just that easy to read?

            “He’s honest. Honest in morals, personality and his day-to-day life. Even when he breaks the rules or goes against someone else’s wishes, it is always done because of some outside force. There is always something ethical driving him and an urge to make sure injustice is dealt with. There are times when he gets so passionate about something wrong in the world and I can’t honestly fathom why he cares. I’m so pessimistic that it was a stark change to see Harry’s way of thinking.”

            Eyes were boring into him from multiple places but it wasn’t enough to make his own leave the table. This wasn’t something he could say as he looked into some stranger’s eyes. This was too personal and he wasn’t comfortable doing it in the first place.

            “Harry loves strongly. When something manages to gain his affection, he holds on tightly, never wanting to give it up. He loves with a ferocity that I’ve never experienced before. He grew bonds with others and cherishes them deeply. Harry loves his friends and would do _anything_ for them. The love that is inside him is his protection against the world. When they mock him and deny his words, he chooses to spend his time with the ones he loves. When he is unsure of his own actions, he surrounds himself in love until he feels even marginally better. His friends are his family and that is a defining quality that shows just who he is. They give him the reason to be courageous. They give him the love that he never had and he gives it back tenfold. Because love is powerful in regard to his motives.”

            Draco took a deep breath as his lips molded into a slight frown.

            “Someone who sees the world in beautiful ways also sees something redeeming in me.” Draco shook his head rapidly. “He sees things that I don’t. I look in the mirror and _wish_ I could see what he does when he looks to me.”

            Harry arched his brows and shook his own head. He didn’t like this at all. He disliked the self-deprecating emotions that the Slytherin sometimes had. If only Draco could see just how special he was.

            “I’m not a positive person. Not even a smidgen of positivity resides in my bones. How can he see something in me that isn’t there?” The question was directed more at himself than anyone else.

            “He forgives me for my actions towards him as easily as he breathes. It wasn’t even hard for him. I don’t understand that. The grudges I hold can last for _years_. If I was in his shoes, trying to forgive myself, I wouldn’t be able to.” Draco closed his eyes tightly. “I wouldn’t be able to just wipe away years of hatred, taunts and hexes.”

            Draco took a breath and continued on. “Honesty is a trait that I have only recently tried to adopt. Facts and honesty are two different things. I can speak the truth in facts but be dishonest at the same time. It’s a trait that I have been taught. I don’t have a moral code that drives me. I don’t look at injustice and want to change it. I don’t have the ethical motives that he does.”

            “Love is something that I was always told was a weakness. Love is something that I never understood. We both know what it’s like to grow up unwanted but unlike Harry, I chose to shut people out. I didn’t want to grow close to anyone. I didn’t want to give anyone the chance to break the brittle shell I built around me.” The only thing keeping him going was the warm press of Harry against him.

            “But Harry chose to see what he was missing and take it for himself. He chose to find love in his friends and those he considers family. I don’t know what that is like.” His voice was a little strained as he kept his eyes closed. Draco felt Harry’s arms tighten to the point of it being slightly uncomfortable bit it was a grounding moment.

            “Someone who loves so strongly and deeply loves _me_.” Draco smiled softly. “He cares for me in ways that no one ever has before. He genuinely cares what I think and never treats me as others do. He’s the only family I’ve ever had and it kills me. What I wouldn’t give to be the family that he deserves.”

            Harry blinked rapidly as he wondered if Draco really believed that. Did his boyfriend really consider himself unworthy?

            “With all the traits that Harry embodies, how could he _not_ be my strength? How could someone so caring, loving, honest, forgiving and positive be in my corner and that _not_ be my strength? I see all of the things that Harry is and it fills me with a strength that is powerful.” Draco bit his lip briefly.

            “I get the confusing reality of him being my weakness _and_ my strength but that’s just life sometimes. Duality to things that make you think harder. Because despite him being my strength, he will still always be the one thing that makes me pause, he will always be the one thing that makes me reconsider things. He will always be the only person to ever get inside of my defenses. He will always be my weakness but that doesn’t stop him from being my strength too.”

            Draco cleared his throat as he unwrapped Harry’s arms from around his waist. “I think that is enough sharing. Excuse me.” His emotions were out of control and he couldn’t be in this room for a minute more.

            Harry watched Draco walk out of the room with worry but he couldn’t go after him without saying a few things.

            He looked up to the rest of the room and noticed that a majority were looking at the kitchen door, either lost in thought or just seeing if Draco would come back in.

            “I’m going to be completely obvious for a moment.” Harry began with a shaky breath. “I love Draco.” He smiled softly. “This may all seem like children and their first love or teenagers with rampant hormones and that could very well be true. But that doesn’t diminish my feelings for him nor does it stop me from seeing the truth. Draco is _not_ his father. He is _not_ the evil of the other side. He is _not_ a spy sent to infiltrate us. He is my boyfriend. Draco is a wonderful, beautiful, snarky bastard. I may be a part of his strength but he is the reason I have any. Draco is so much more than his name. He is so much more than his familial ties. _He is so much more._ ”

            Harry looked down to his hands for a moment before steeling his resolve and meeting the eyes of everyone in the room.

            “Draco has more heart inside of him than he realizes. He has more heart inside of him than this organization. He may not be what you expected or what you wish. He may not be the kind of person you would usually consider for the Order and that honestly says more against you than him. Because if you won’t accept him or give him the chance, then what kind of light side are you? What kind of people are you?”

            Harry raised his hands in the air as a gesture of giving up. “I don’t care what you decide to do. I don’t care if you accept us or deny us. I will fight with or without you. But…” He pointed towards the direction Draco went. “That boy, the one you judge so harshly, he is the support that will get me through all of this. I don’t need you but I do need him.”

            “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a boyfriend to console.”

            Finding Draco was easy. The Slytherin hadn’t gone far at all. Harry found him on the bottom step of the stairs with his head in his hands.

            “Did you mean that?” Draco whispered, raising his head to peer into Harry’s concerned eyes.

            Harry’s heart clenched painfully at the shine to grey eyes. He reached up a hand and cupped Draco’s cheek.

            “Which part?”

            Draco let out a watery laugh. “All of it. Do you really see me like that?”

            Harry sat on the floor and pulled Draco into his lap, despite the weak protests that were emitted.

            “You said that you wished you could see what I do when I look at you.” Harry whispered softly. “So do I.”

            Draco settled himself more comfortably on Harry’s lap and tried blocking out the fact that they were on the ground. The nasty floor that Sirius couldn’t be trusted to clean.

            “Draco, you see the world in ways that I wish I could.”

            That had Draco blinking doubtfully as he narrowed his eyes disbelievingly. Was Harry just going to use his words against him?

            Harry rolled his eyes at the suspicion. “When you talked about my positivity and how I see the good in people, you didn’t mention the way that can be a hindrance. You didn’t talk about the downfall of only seeing the good in people. When one chooses to believe in everyone, then there will be a few who slip through that and take advantage.”

            That had Draco humming in thought at the logic.

            “Not to mention that you can spot lies so much quicker than I can. When someone says something, you can nearly always tell if they are being truthful. While I try and see their personality, you have already seen what I can’t.” Harry smiled softly at the confusion on Draco’s face. It was obvious that his lover hadn’t stopped to consider this side of things.

            “I love that you are pessimistic. I love that you see things in a way that I don’t. I love the negative but dry humor. I love how you are different from me.”

            Draco bit his lip as he peered at Harry through his lashes. Being told this was almost seductive in a way. These were qualities that he had always been told were wrong. But they were just who he was and it was nice to hear Harry’s opinion.

            “If you want to hold grudges, then do it.” Harry continued as he ran his fingers through Draco’s hair, smiling when a pale hand smacked his own away. “I don’t need nor care if you forgive people. If it doesn’t feel right, then it wasn’t meant to be. If that is something you want to change, then I will support you. I will support anything you decide to do.”

            Draco wasn’t sure if he did want to change some things about himself. Self-growth can be hard. But if he wanted to be forgiven for the things he has done to others, then he shouldn’t be so quick to hold a grudge. That wasn’t fair.

            “The motives that drive me don’t have to be the ones that define you.” Harry pointed out. “If being honest morally isn’t what drives you, then that’s fine. Find something that does. As long as you stand beside me for mine, then I will stand beside you for yours.”

            Every word out of Harry’s mouth had Draco’s heart racing. It was hard to believe that he had gotten lucky enough to have someone like him for a boyfriend.

            “You are also daft.”

            The insult had Draco leaning away to frown. “Excuse you?” All these sweet words and then the Gryffindor just throws in that?

            Harry smirked before pressing a kiss to Draco’s nose. “You have just as much love inside of you as I do.” He held up a finger when it looked like the blonde was going argue.

            “It’s hard to experience affection when you have been starved of it your whole life.” This was something they both understood. This was something they had to live with and it was something that drew them closer together.

            “Without experiencing it, it’s hard to give it.” Harry continued with a shrug. “Just because you chose to shut people out does _not_ mean that you are incapable of having depths of love.” He could tell that Draco wasn’t of the same belief and it was sad to Harry. It was sad that his boyfriend was blind to his own merits.

            “You love me.” Harry stated with feeling. It was a fact that he knew without a doubt.

            “I do.” Draco immediately responded. “I love you, so much.” He furrowed his brows when Harry gave him a pointed look. “But I have a hard time expressing that to other people.”

            “That’s alright.” Harry whispered. “It will eventually happen. When you open up your heart for others, it will come. You are already fond of Sirius and Remus.”

            Draco snorted. “Remus maybe but Sirius? Never.” It was just a tad bit passed a lie. He was grateful for his cousin. Grateful for the chance Sirius had given him. But he couldn’t deny that he liked to mess with the man. It wasn’t his fault that the animagus made it so _easy_.

            His boyfriend could deny it all he likes but Harry knew better. He knew what Draco was like when the blonde genuinely disliked someone. Sirius wasn’t even close to being someone the Slytherin hated. There _was_ a fondness there and it went both ways.

            Looking into Draco’s eyes had Harry sighing besottedly. “You are my strength too.”

            Part of Draco wanted to deny this. The doubts of his mind were whispering that it couldn’t be true. But the conviction in Harry’s tone and the love in green eyes were speaking louder than his worries.

            “Living as the boy-who-lived leaves me with doubts. It has me questioning this faith that people have in me. I am always seen as their hero or their villain. I never know just who I am supposed to be.” Harry rested his forehead against Draco’s.

            “But when I am with you, all of that fades away. You don’t care about my name. You see _me_. You see my reckless nature and tease me. You see my own faults and find them endearing. The things I dislike about myself are the very things you love about me. There is this underlying support when it comes to us. It is something that I know will always be there. You love me, care about me, support me and genuinely like being with me.” Harry paused when Draco’s eyes went glossy once more. “How could you not be my strength?”

            Despite it being his own words said back to him, Draco was utterly captivated. “I love you.” He whispered before capturing Harry’s lips in a soft kiss.

            “I love you too.” Harry mumbled against Draco’s lips before getting back into another kiss.

            Draco groaned when Harry’s hands moved slowly down his back and cupped his arse and the kiss deepened.

            “Someone is randy today.” Draco pointed out as he ground his arse downward. “This will make three times just this afternoon.”

            “I can’t help it. You are irresistible.”

            Draco smirked widely. “Now that is a truth if I have ever heard one.”

            That had Harry rolling his eyes. “We can add humble to your list of attributes later but can we get naked first?” He thrusted upward and loved the way silver eyes darkened.

            The wicked smirk on Draco’s face was a little suspicious but Harry wasn’t in the mood to be really concerned by it.

            “I was thinking that you might be a little sore from both times earlier.”

            Harry frowned in thought. He wasn’t too bad, nothing a healing potion later couldn’t help with.

            “So, how about you use those delectable seeker hands of yours and open me up for your thick cock.”

            Harry bit his lip to stop the loud groan that wanted to escape at Dracos’ words.

            “Please don’t.” A horrified squeak had them startling. Draco only managed to stay on Harry’s lap because strong hands gripped his hips.

            They both looked behind them to note that Ron, Hermione and Ginny were standing by the closed kitchen door with wide eyes.

            “We got kicked out so that they could come to a final decision.” Hermione explained in a slow manner as she seemed to be struggling with herself. She gestured between Harry and Draco. “That was an overshare of things I never want to imagine.”

            “Speak for yourself.” Ginny mumbled as she fanned herself lightly. When she was on the receiving end of four disbelieving looks, she raised her hands in surrender.

            Draco narrowed his eyes at the youngest Weasley. He wasn’t sure what to think of her. It was common knowledge that the girl liked Harry. The moment she arrived at Hogwarts she had been an odd obsessive one. He couldn’t blame her for that. Harry was quite the catch. But Harry was _his_.

            Ginny tilted her head to the side before slowly extending her hand. “I imagine we will be seeing quite a bit of each other.”

            “Yes.” Draco replied, not sure why she wanted them to shake hands. He was still a little wary about this.

            “It’s obvious you care about Harry.” The girl continued with her hand still stretched outwards. “Maybe we can start over?”

            Harry rolled his eyes when Draco regarded Ginny in suspicion. The blonde acted as if this was some kind of conspiracy theory.     

            Draco gripped her hand firmly as he locked eyes with her. “We can always try. I will no doubt insult you though. Can’t quite curb my tongue.” Not that he wanted to either.

            When they dropped their hands, Ginny grinned widely. “I find myself looking forward to that.”

            “Why?” Draco had never encountered someone who _wanted_ to be insulted before.

            “It’s a nice change of pace.” Was the only answer he received and it baffled Draco.

            Harry grinned before placing a kiss on Draco’s neck. He knew exactly what Ginny was talking about. Most people weren’t like Draco. The insults were their own language and his attitude was not one of a typical friend. It _was_ a change of pace and it changed the monotony of the sometimes boring experience of friendship.

            Well, Weasleys were always unusual. Draco shook his head as he pushed her odd logic away and looked around the room. His eyes snapped to Granger and his heart filled with a very uncomfortable feeling. He knew that she wasn’t approving of their relationship and he couldn’t blame her. It wasn’t as if he had ever proven himself to be a nice person. Or someone deserving of Harry. At least in her eyes.

            “Granger, can I talk to you?”

            Harry’s brows rose in surprise but he moved his hands so that Draco could get off his lap.

            Hermione wasn’t sure she was prepared for this conversation. This was going to be a crossing point. This was going to be a moment that changed things. She shot Ron a look and couldn’t help but smile at the conviction that was in his eyes. She gripped his hand once, letting him know she was fine and held the same conviction.

            There were no doubt in her mind that she would be safe. Malfoy wasn’t going to harm her. This much Hermione knew.

            She chose to say nothing as she dropped Ron’s hand and moved over towards the other side of the room, knowing that the Slytherin would follow.

            “What’s Malfoy doing?” Ron wondered as he sat on the stairs halfway up and peered down at Harry.

            Harry smiled softly as he looked to Draco. The rigid stance showed that his lover was uncomfortable and not entirely willing to have the conversation.

            “Self-growth.” The reply had Ron’s brows pinching in confusion. “He’s choosing who he wants to be.”

            Ron shook his head slowly. “That was vague and unhelpful.”

            “Qualities that Draco can sometimes embody.”

            “I heard that Potter!”

            Harry grinned widely as he sent a wink towards the now glaring Slytherin. “Love you!”

            “I’m sure you do.” Draco grumbled before pulling out Remus’ wand and placing a silencing charm around him and Granger. This was _not_ a conversation that he wanted to have with listening ears.

            Harry looked to Ron when it was clear that they wouldn’t be able to hear anything. “You worried?”

            Ron didn’t look to Hermione to gauge the scene, his eyes were on Malfoy. “No.” The reply was quiet and thoughtful. “I’m not.” Malfoy was something else and he just hadn’t had the time to figure the other boy out. Nor was he sure where the blonde’s placement on his chessboard would fall. After today, there was no way he would be able to look at the Slytherin in the same light as he once did.

             Things were changing.

**Author's Note:**

> I really wanted to include the conversation with Hermione in this one but I just couldn't. I do realize that this series is getting lengthy and I need to get to Hogwarts. Don't worry. This will happen. I might include some time skips during the next one, I haven't decided but the end of summer is approaching. 
> 
> Also Suzy will be in the next one! No worries about my house elf. Her return is coming. :P
> 
> I wasn't entirely sure about this one. I do think that the things Harry said are important. It isn't right to keep him in the dark. Especially considering just who he is. They only include him in things when they need him. Can I just say that a badass Harry is kind of doing it for me. I so wish he could have said some things to the Order in the original. Or just stood up for himself at times. 
> 
> Draco being badass is also doing it for me. I debated with myself on some of the things he said. Partly because it seemed that giving away so much of himself was out of character but he was right when he said that being his normal Slytherin self would not get their approval. The Order operates differently and he needed to get on their level. I also think that they both have issues from their upbringing and that the self-doubting stems from that. 
> 
> The small part in Hermione's POV was not planned until I was actually in the chapter. I wasn't going to show her perspective but I do feel that it is necessary. I think to understand her reluctance, it would need to be voiced. I needed to make you guys feel what she was thinking and not just say it. Also, in no way do I think Draco could ever be really included into the trio if he didn't apologize in some form. As Harry said, it's self-growth. Admitting you were wrong is hard and not always easy. But doing it anyways is actually really important and shows true character. 
> 
> So even though this installment was on the sappy side, it also had some important things mixed in as well. I do like this one. 
> 
> See you next time!
> 
> -XxTheDarkLordxX


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